And then came Apple Water

I am indebted to Miyoko Yamada of Scoopertino for making my day.

Step aside, Perrier. Prepare for oblivion, Poland Spring. After steamrolling the music player, smartphone and tablet markets, Apple is out to disrupt a whole new category (according to spoof website Scoopertino).

Yesterday, Apple apparently announced ‘Apple Water’ – a cool refreshment made for those willing to suspend all logic and pay the price for Apple’s lavish attention to quality and design.

“If you’ve been drinking the juice, you’re ready to drink the water,” proclaimed Apple’s website.

Like iPod, iPhone and iPad, Apple Water is part of a closed ecosystem. By breaking the seal, you accept a User Agreement that prohibits refilling the container with tap water, spring water or any unauthorised third-party water.

“We’ve heard people say ‘there must be something in the water over there’,” said mock-Apple spokesperson Lindsay Grebner, “and there is. We’re happy to share our water with fans all over the world.”

Apple Water is indeed an Apple lover’s dream: pure, clean H2O, captured in Apple-designed containers from the central irrigation spigot at Apple’s corporate headquarters.

AAPL stock soared on the announcement today. Analyst Gene Munster of Piper Jaffray raised his target price to $500, noting the low cost of materials, and customers’ “endless thirst and inscrutable need” for all things Apple.

Worth a chuckle, I’m sure you’ll agree.

Source: Scoopertino